It's okay to ask why

"And though down here, I may not understand, I wont let go of the Unseen Hand For it holds the reasons why. The Lord has never been afraid of honest prayers And He won't allow the burden to be more than you can bear. When He knows that your trust is in Him He doesn't mind the questions now and then. Even if you wonder Why, Do the rainy days have to come, When the storm clouds hide the sun. I wanna know why Why When the reasons aren't clear to me When it all is a mystery I want to know why."


This is an old song I used to listen to when I was in middle school. It was always a comfort to me in the really hard times. Now, I feel it's an appropriate comfort. 
The past few days it seems like some really "bad" stuff has been happening. Not just in my life, but around the globe. The oil spill has been going on for a while. Lives are being lost. Not just lives but young lives. Infant lives. Lives that haven't even begun to be lived. Lives are coming to an end. But then other lives are being created and born. 
As Christians I think we fathom it as a sin to ever ask questions. 
We think if we question God, we are lacking faith. 
In reality it's the questions that make our faith stronger. 
God never promised life would be easy. He never said "I died for you now go live your harmonious life". He did say our burdens will never be too much for us to bear. Sometimes I have to wonder why I can't be weaker because then my burden would be less. But if I were weaker the burden would sometimes still feel like too much. 
Life sometimes just sucks. I've been saying that a lot lately. Things have just sucked. And I've felt bad for being in a crummy mood. I've felt bad for feeling like life has been hard. But what's been going on in my life is hard to me. It may not be an oil spill, or death, but it still hurts my heart. And it's still okay to ask why. 
It's okay to take things and process them. Processing may require the questions and the tears and the anger and the hurt. But then...God stands waiting with arms wide open. 
For the past 12 days God has been standing arms wide open for me. And it took me until today to really say "Okay God, here I am. Hold me". It took until today for me to really allow healing to begin. 
Healing has begun. My questions have been asked and now some have been answered. Some haven't and probably won't be. But God is holding me tight. He loves me. He has wiped away the tears and He has said "be still my child". 
Life is good. Even when it hurts. Things suck sometimes. Situations really suck sometimes. But it's TRULY OKAY to ask why.